The Biggest Mistakes Guys Make On Dates With Women

Tips from Nick Shane
Author of "How to Become a Playboy"

Whenever a guy has a date with a beautifulwoman he tries to impress her. This is so wrong.If you court a woman like we did 50 years ago,try to buy her affection with flowers and giftsor want to impress her so she will like you ...you are on the wrong track!

Look, it's amazing how every man who askedfor my advice has the exact same problems withwomen. No wonder, they ALL make the same goddamnmistakes when it comes to women and dating. Here's what usually happens.
on a date.

Either she will just make a random excuse right there like "oh I'm sorry, I can't. My cousin is in town and I have to spend time with her" or "I have yoga class today, maybe some other time." ...or she doesn't cancel on you and will actually agree to meet up with you again. But when your date is almost over, she won'tkiss you and just tell you that "you are anice but she just isn't that attracted to you".

Then, when everything has failed and yourealize that she doesn't want to be with you... you start to wonder what went wrong.

I'm here to help. The thing is, every guy makes the samemistakes when he is on a date with a beautifulwoman. So here's my black list: a) You pay her lots of compliments. You tell her how nice she looks and how beautiful her eyes are ... and she will say thank you but that's as far as it goes. Paying compliments is a nice gesture, but doesn't push a woman's buttons or turns her on. Oops, you're a wimp! Women don't get physical with those type of men. Sorry! b) You try to be nice...same deal here: Women don't like nicey-nice guys and never go past a first date or further than a kiss on the cheek. c) You act clingy and needy. The more you act like you want sex, the less you will get it. Butthere is nothing worse than a guy who acts needy and desperate for sex. It has to be the biggest turn-off in any woman. So relax, play a little hard to get and let her chase YOU...not theother way around. d) You try to BUY her affection withflowers, chocolates, drinks or even a cuddly toy. It doesn' work because she will NOT get emotionally attracted to you. If you want her to think you are hot and sexy, turn up the heat by being CHEEKY...and not by buying her things. e) You go on a classic date such as arestaurant or the movies where you evenagree to pay for everything. Classic datesare out. Go window shopping or have a coffeewhere she has to buy the second round. Be aman for god's sake and not a doormat you hear? So in a nutshell, everything you do thatlets a woman know that you WANT her and reallyTRY to get her will not have a happy ending.You got to behave like you are the catch andnot her. YOU need to be the challenge no matter howbeautiful you think your date looks. If you wantto be with her, you have to keep her on her toesand let her wonder about you. Keep teasing herby being cheeky and busting her balls and shewill get attracted to you in an instant. But for now make sure you don't make theabove mistakes anymore because if you do, youwill get what 97% of other guys get after theyhad a date with a beautiful woman...another female friend.

*** QUESTION ***

Sup Nick,I've been reading your newsletters andI've been wondering about a few things.Women like jerks? Why do they like jerks?Its taken me all my life to finally realizethat women don't like nice guys and pussysbecause they are so boring, but there hasto be more than just the fact that jerksare a little more exciting?

>>> MY COMMENTS:

Yeah Stu, you're right, women don'tlike nice guys because they are boring. Here is why women like jerks andbadboys so much: Everyone has heard of natural selection, right?Animals with characteristics that are favorablewill survive and pass them on to the next generation. For example, the lion came about because itwas big and fearsome and could kick all the otheranimals asses. So it survived and formed a new species. Put that into perspective. Humans want toreproduce with people that are healthy andintelligent. That is as basic as it gets. That is why we generally like slim, tonedwomen and not fat, obese ones. So women will want to mate with a man whocan get what he wants and will protect her. Yeahof course films and love songs will tell you shewants to be protected and cherished, but her naturalinstinct is to survive and produce offspring withfavorable characteristics. Of course, women don't really like jerks.They may be attracted to them but they wontlike them as much as a player or a badboy. By treating a woman with a little more respectthan an asshole, but by staying bad you can giveher the best of both world's.

*** COMMENT FROM A READER ***

Nick you are the sh*t. I work in a bar and am always around beautiful women... and your stuff has helped me put dumbstruck faces on my now jealous friends. Two weeks ago I was in the laundromat and there was this cute little tanned dark-haired girl I used to know from years ago when I was still a complete wuss, although I never really had the confidence to even talk to her. Anyway, she's a definite 9 and one of those chicks who just see through you or never even glance your way. But now I had a weapon to use. I stood facing away from her and looked at her and gave a sly little james bond smile and simply said

Me : "Hey! You went to my High school"

Her: Yea

Me: Still living with your momie? (James bond smile)

Her: (Laughs) Yea just for a while till I get....

Me: (Interrupting) Yea whatever.

Her: (Laughs).

So my laundry's done, I pack and go out to my car. Just as I start the engine she runs out with a piece of paper with her digits!!! Can you believe it?! I do have 1 question: I have Huge approach anxiety. Its all in my head but when I'm about to approach a girl on the street or anywhere my head goes blank and I give myself some lame excuse like " oh I'll keep looking around first" or "I dont want her anyways" you know. What can I tell myself to fix thisor how do I just get these feelings to just piss off. I needa good mindset for approaches Dude! Its Killing me!!

Kian Dublin City, Ireland.

>>> MY COMMENTS: Ahh, the classic "I'm too scared to approach a womanand I keep making excuses for my sorry butt". Well first of all: GREAT job! You pulled a textbook example of how it's supposed to be done. Playing hard to get, busting her balls, being a challenge, teasing,... the works! But let me tell you that the BIGGEST mistake a guy can make when it comes to meeting women ... is to NOT DO ANYTHING AT ALL! If you don't act, you lose! The quick answer to eliminating fear is actually very simple: You have to REDUCE the fear and make it smaller every time you approach a new woman until it's gone completely.

Here's how to do this:

A) Get more comfortable at approaching womenby getting loads of practice. If you've never doneit, no wonder you're scared. So you better start now!

B) Don't think of it as an approach, think of itas you becoming a natural at TALKING to people. Wheneveryou pass a woman, just open your mouth and say "Hi" andsee how she reacts.

C) ALWAYS (!) have a great line as backup whenyou are about to freeze after the "Hi". There's LOADSof examples in my newsletter, my website and my books. But the REAL secret of approaching women is toNOT think about it. It's as simple as pie guys. It'snot easy ... (every guy is scared of rejection and doesn'tlike his ego getting bruised) ... but it's a very SIMPLE process. Say "Hi" NATURALLY like you just saw her walkingpast you ... and throw in a one-liner if you can'theat up attraction on the spot. That's it. The more you think, the more you overcomplicate things.Just take any intro line from my website (like the mascaraline) or any other form my books and use it after yousaid "Hey, what's up". For starters, that should do the trick!
'
*** SUCCESS STORY ***

Hey I just want to say I used your line saying letme get your opinion on something. She said sure well Iwas like I heard woman can only put on mascara if theyhave there mouth open is that true? She said not all woman open there mouths then I started talking to her andthen soon I realized we talk for an hours! Before I readyour techniques and followed your tips I didn't know what tosay to her. I was only good to talking to woman the first time Imet her or couldn't even say say hey whats up because I wouldalways freeze up like I dont know what else to say. But this isall changed now, thanks to you Nick! I just want to say I reallylike using your techniques...I can now talk to 6 girls and get 4 numbers so ya I love your style man!

Matthew Johnson
Dallas Texas

>>> MY RESPONSE

Everybody seems to love me these days :) I TOLD YOU it would work! If you haven't triedthis line yet ... jesus! Go and try it right now,TODAY! It works every-single-time! That's your golden ticket to a newphone number right there. Not get yourself to a mall,a bar or a coffee-shop and use it on the first attractivewoman you see. Get her number, arrange a date ... and I'll be waitingfor your success story!

*** QUESTION ***

Hi Nick, thank you for giving me your suggestions aboutattracting beautiful women. I have not downloaded yourmaterials yet. However, I am receiving your free newsletters.I just recently subscribed to your newsletters. Well, here is astory that I would like to tell you. I was working at a financialservice company. While I was working, I decided to take my10 minute break. I went to the break room so that I cansit down. Suddenly, I saw this woman that I like. I haveseen her in the cafeteria plenty of times, but I neverasked her out because I assumed she was married. Thistime I took a chance and made a move. As she was walkingout of the cafeteria, I stopped her while I was sittingdown. I told her what my plans are for tonight. I toldher I am going to hang out on a Friday night and thatshe should come along. I did not ask her out on a date.Your newsletter taught me not to ask a woman out on dates.Instead, I gave her suggestions, and I offered her myinvitation about what I am going to do tonight. Thewoman told me that she had plans for the weekend. Sinceshe had plans for the weekend, I asked her if she wouldlike to go out with me on a Monday night instead of aFriday night. She told me she is dating somebody. I askedher when can she go out, and she said she doesn't know.I asked her why doesn't she know. She didn't answer myquestion, so she just walked away from me. I can tell shedid not have any gut level emotional feelings towards me.I moved on to the next available person. After my 10 minutebreak, I went downstairs. I asked another woman out the sameway I asked the first woman. She also told me she had a boyfriend. Does that mean she doesn't know me better to accept my offer? What should I have done to make her respond positively?When she said she was dating somebody, does that mean she is not interested in me?How do I break a women's barrier when she say's "I have a boyfriend."? Norm B,South Florida>>> MY RESPONSE Please don't make me use my WIMP-bat and whack youover the head with it. Look, I said you should NEVER ask a woman out ... that's true.But I also said that if you want to arrange a get-together witha woman ... you need to make sure she's ALREADY attracted to you. Do you get that? She needs to feel that gut-level feeling BEFORE you tell hershe should hang out with you. I mean why on earth would she want to see you? You haven'tpushed NONE of her emotional buttons yet! You didn't make her LAUGH! You didn't make her WANT you! You didn't present yourself as a CHALLENGE! You didn't bust her balls! The list goes on and on ... to sum it up: YES, you are a WIMP!She even gave you numerous hints that you are one. Here, look: She told you she was dating somebody/has a boyfriend. If she wasattracted to you, she wouldn't mention him ... even if she had one. She can't see you because she is doing something else. Obvious excuse,because if she WANTED to see you, she would rearrange her plans or makea counter-offer. You asked WHY she can't see you, and she walked away. You are justthrowing on fire here. She isn't attracted, she got annoyed becauseyou acted liek such a nice-guy and wimp ... and walked away. You didn't ask her out like all the other nice-guys do ... butyou forgot to get the attraction going. If you can't do that, every woman will STILL see you as a wimp and nice guy.